I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
my life is about to be the like the hunger games except with penises. and im going to win.
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
Oh fuck, I'm officially a cougar..he's got the same name as my grandson
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
Randomize
