We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
I got her a Nickelback box set.
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
Do you think the neighbors will know I was the one giving out the penis shaped lollipops to the children?
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
I gave up on alcohol forever for like 2 hours, that's got to be a new record
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
He was lasting forever and I couldn't take it so I faked an asthma attack
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
my roommate had drunk sex above me in our bunk bed and then built me a fort to apologize the next day
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