whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
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