I have demons in me.
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
I was batman and I saved her. Then we had sex on a rooftop.
My first sex dream, I blew myself. Yours definitely wins.
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
I just found that video of you jumping onto my exercise ball feet-first and face-planting into my shoe rack.
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
Grandma is giving me marriage advice again. On the plus side, she thinks I'm straight now.
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
How am I supposed to be friends with him when there's an exact replica of his dick in my underwear drawer?
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
She asked what it would take for you to fuck her. You drunkenly mumbled, "pepperoni pizza" and then got in the cab by yourself. You were smiling too. It was weird.
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
Randomize
