You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
CALL 911 HAND IS STUCK IN THE GARBAGE DISPOSAL. HELP
Do we still have any pizza left from last night?
I only have one kid whom I wish to hit in the face with an active jackhammer. How's work?
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
And then you poured the rest of the vodka into salsa and added the alcohol soaked pineapples and grapes and said "don't touch my salsa breakfast".
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
Randomize
