problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
at some point when you're making out with the ex girlfriend of your ex fuck buddy who happens to be the ex boyfriend of the girl that you just got drunk with who was hitting on your current fuck buddy who is best friends with your ex boyfriend, it just hits you: oh my god i need to get out more and expand my social circle.
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
What's the most polite way to ask if you puked in my vase?
Sometimes I think that I have too much self esteem
Then I realize that I'm just really fucking pretty.
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
I JUST FARTED SO LOUD AND HARD I IMMEDIATELY TASTED IT
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
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