So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
we're microwaving frozen margaritas its not the same without u
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
You were saying you didn't want to go home and insisted that I drop you guys off at your uncles. That's how you ended up sleeping on a porch with two dudes
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
Dude, I brought the fucking tequila to that party and they cheered for the chick that seriously only brought limes.
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
I found dried jizz from last night on my leg while feeding an infant a bottle. I am not fit to care for children
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
I’m gonna stop you right there. The last time you had a “brilliant” idea, I woke up to my kitchen covered in flour and a javelin through my tv.
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