I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
This last weekend single handedly took me off the liver transplant list
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
i just spent 10 minutes talking to the lady who works at taco bell about my romantic situation.
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
I don't really know how to say this, but I have an oven mitt to return to you tomorrow..
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
you got in a fight with your imaginary friend last night when he didn't catch you after a surprise trust fall
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
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