question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
When the cops came you just told them you'd go to your time out corner.
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
If your nipples ruin my wedding photos I will kill you.
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
I'm on my third roll of toilet paper. Today can fuck right off.
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
Randomize
