Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you woke me up in the middle of the night to tell me you were taking off your pants and it was not an invitation.
i was way too optimistic last night... got back to my apartment and the porch light was still on, like i'd actually make it all the way home.
I take back all the times I've said life was unfair. I'm about to have two trained bartenders for a girlfriend and roommate
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
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It's really not cool dreaming about going into labor with your ex boyfriends love child as you're sleeping next to him.
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
My horseshoe mustache feels at home at this bar.
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
A 'Bear Fight' is a car bomb followed by a Jaeger bomb. Fuckface and I do those on slow days. Tonight, we did a 'Polar Bear on Fire'. Fireball, a bear fight in the middle, and end with rumple minze.
I made friends at the beach bars tonight. Several were worried for my well being.
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
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