scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
FYI: if you have sex in your room with the light on, we can totally see your shadows from the parking lot
Your boyfriend has good rhythm though.
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
i called my brother from the living room and paid him a dollar to turn off the light in my room. ive hit rock bottom
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
Realized I'm still to drunk to comprehend work emails. Marked them all as unread. Here's to responsible hang overs.
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
I got a blow torch for Christmas. You are now permitted to be afraid.
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
I'm high on the exercise bike at the gym. I feel like Lance Armstrong
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
Randomize
