My cousins just decided to make a catapult to spread my Grandpa's cremated remains. I love my family.
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
I got asked if I was pregnant as a pickup line
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
There is blood all over my sheets and no discernible source.
My liver has officially said "fuck this shit" and escaped from my body.
Randomize