mrs. f**** your sons in jail, if you can help with bail please respond, if not please dont tell him i told you.
Mother fucker. I'm a 30J now. I'm fucking speechless
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...
Bring scissors.....i think im gonna have to be cut out of this damn jockstrap
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
It wasn't as awesome as they lead everyone to believe. No stripper. Ran out of booze. The chipmunk. He was real.
Randomize
