therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
be right there i have to get my cape
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
I just realized my hands still smell like your cock. Which is awesome, but I wonder if the clerk at the store appreciated it.
I feel bad. I'm the reason hand sanitizer exists.
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
QUIT BEING A BITCH, DRINK SOME PEPTO, AND PUKE ON OUR FOES
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
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