you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
I feel like a combination of david goes to the dentist and drunkest guy ever goes for more beer
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
He just got home drunk. He ate 5 snack cakes, said Little Debbie's his bitch, went upstairs and fell asleep.
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
Randomize
