STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
new years resolution: more sex, less car punching, more chipotle.
I can't go out tonight. I feel like I'm starting to party as much as Farrah on Teen Mom.
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
For future reference, even the most well-intentioned game of whiskey pong is a terrible idea.
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
My wife climbed on top of me, fucked my brains out, and gave me money from the ATM. I'm living the dream.
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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