Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
Dude, the girl i fucked last night left wearing my high school musical shirt you bought me. she also left her panties here though.
The one with Zac Efrons face on it? You definitely got the short in of the stick. i'd rather have the shirt
fuck. yeah me too. i don't even think these panties would fit me
Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
You know who really doesn't like surpise in-your-face air guitar solos? Strangers.
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
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