Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
I didn't cheat on him. Cheating means finding out. I made sure he was at work first. After the guy left I got shitfaced just so nothing seemed out of the ordinary when he came home.
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
Hey have you ever thought about fishing cause I'd like to go fishing but don't know anyone that fishes and I'm gonna cry because. FISHING
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
Had to go see my sisters new baby this morn in the clothes I wore to the rave last night. Still drunk. Almost dropped it. I'll be a good aunt right?
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
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