I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
I look better un-naked...
Her vagina was like a man-sized safe.
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
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