why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
Little spoons don't ask big questions
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
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