you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
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just took my abortion antibiotic with my martini. i no longer wonder how i got into this situation.
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
waking up outside has become so normal, the paper boy knows to set the paper next to me
GOING OUT OF BUSINESS: we're having a foreclosure party tonight...We'll also be raffling off a washer/dryer, microwave and a white tiger head.
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I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
Two big black bouncers picked you up and escorted you to the elevator.
I didn't even do anything wrong. For all they knew I could have been on the US Olympic Gymnastic team. Would they kick Gabby Douglas out of a bar? I don't think so.
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
YOU'D BE LIKE A MERMAID! I'll bring you coffee filters to cover your tits.
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