you guys were way drunker than both of me
Ask me how many people I've slept with. Because its changed since I last saw you.
I saw you 20 MINUTES AGO. You need to stop this.
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
So I just went to clothing optional bar
I just swiped right for a guy on Tinder solely because it looked like he was holding Zoboomafoo
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
So, I've discovered that I'm approximately 70% nicer to my mother when I've had an orgasm in the last 48 hours. It's science.
Randomize
