yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
i asked if you wanted help changing your sheets after you threw up in bed. you politely declined. i take no responsibility after that.
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
The nurse who handed me my discharge papers underlined and highlighted do not consume alcohol while on my painkiller its like she knows me.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
I'm still drunk. it's summer. I just need a hot dog and an aspirin.
Obama's speech on in 9 mins. Me in the shower now. Naked. Make your choice.
I'm bringing the tv in with me.
You said something about how beautiful my pockets were, then walked away.
Yes talking about pockets is classic me.
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
You're going to be mad because I got baked, but not that mad because I'm bringing home kfc.
Heard I spat fire in your face last night. Wish I could say that I'm sorry
House vote, we're revoking your 151 privileges
I'm sorry.
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
Randomize
