How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
I just realized that my mother and I have the same favorite sex position, Guess which one!
OMG! Ew.
Lucky Dad.
I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
Building a door into the garage so when I bring girls home my mom doesn't wake up.
Pathetic yet considerate
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
I'm going to write a new song and call it "Did I wax my vagina for this?" remind me to never go across the country for a penis ever again.
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
Randomize
