Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
I'm watching the Australian Open. They need to slow the fuck down. It's hard enough to follow sober and now it's just pissing me off.
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
Turns out my drunken logic and wordsmithing isn't quite the same as the sober version. I'm pretty sure I made fun of the managers mom at one point
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
I’m drunk and naked and looking for my charger - title of my autobiography.
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
Randomize