And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
It was only 12:11 and I needed to make a Pepto Latte and call it a night, I don't remember that being part of my new years resolution.
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
My pants are like a grocery bag containing ONLY jelly beans right now.
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
He just brought a live lobster to the party.
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
Its 6:30pm and dad just drunk called me asking me what the alarm code at home is..... I'm at home, and dad isn't here.....
Who the hell tries to steal eggnog.
Randomize
