Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
you're asking me why i keep burn ointment in my purse.... do you really want to know the answer to that question?
Found trail of ibuprofen on ground. I'm like the intervention version of e.t.
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
I gave him a BJ and he left. Coincidentally that's the name of my memoir.
After you puked in the bathtub you claimed you were never eating quesadillas again and you never even ate a quesadilla
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
Just had a reminder come up that just said "Ham"
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Randomize
