I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
Thank God for cruise control and the Starbucks cup I had to puke in.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
dude I'm not 100% but I think your mom is sexting me.
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
Just pretend you're riding a unicorn through space. Thats how I deal with the stirrup situation at the gyno office.
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
Can I just skip the lesson I have planned for tomorrow and just teach my students about Prohibition using my impending hangover?
This is why american education is failing
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
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