it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
literally the only thing you kept saying was "i wish i had a beer keg vending machine that accepted hugs as payment" and everytime you said it you rubbed the urn her grandmother's remains were in
just tried to pee in the sink at wendys...need to stop letting my drunk habits get into my sober life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
Unless your apartment has 3 am pancakes Im not coming over.
My mom is wine drunk and on painkillers. As invigorating as that conversation was, it was also a dark glimpse into my future
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mom is currently drinking alone in our kitchen singing the Dixie Chicks to herself so, hey, alcohol is forever and we should not be shamed for its use.
I slapped him but he didn't wake up. He just nuzzled my head, hugged me closer, and smiled.
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
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