Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
how was your night?
well, i just purchased 'sorry for being a drunk whore' cupcakes. how do you think my night was?
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
We're going to work out tomorrow I guess but it usually consists of doing weights for 10 minutes, then saying fuck cardio and going to Taco Tuesday
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
I have feelings that need drinking.
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
I just found a condom in my jolly ranchers bag. This is a good omen.
Randomize
