party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
i'm chasing tequila w mint flavored ice cream, phil's chasing it w cream cheese, bashar's chasing it w pickles...i think we all know who the winner is....
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
Found a pint glass in my snow pants.
I thanked her dad for "firing off a good one" when she was conceived. She said thats why he doesnt like me.
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
I think vodka/water/skittles totally beats your crystal light mimosas
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
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