return my video game
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
I puked on myself in front of a customer. all. over. myself. thanks Saturday nights
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
my entire left arm went numb
you need to get that checked to make sure you're not wired to have strokes instead of orgasms
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
He had a small dick and screamed "I will kill you if you don't get hard" to it in German...awkward time to have to explain I speak German too...
This is why you need to stop sleeping with freshmen.
Randomize