my "about me" section on Facebook should read "hell-bound alcoholic who wants to fuck a 40-year-old crackhead"
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
She won't let me open the car door while we are on the highway so I can throw up outside. She deserves to have her car thrown up in.
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
I've never seen anyone as high as you were.. you collapsed onto the kitchen floor hugging a tub of ice cream. You named it phil.
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize
