I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
The only coherent words in the 6 texts i recieved were don't, cute, fucking, beer, and lions
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
The fact that you're allowing Santa to dry hump your ass is sort of a dealbreaker
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What shitty, shitty thing could you possibly tell me that doesnt top the fact that i got hammered and showed everyone i could shit while running
Drunk at work, covered in Cheetos is no way to go through life.
I found Cheetos.
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
This is my life. Enjoy the view
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
Randomize