Iced coffee. Banana. Two dumps. Life is good.
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon".
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
There's a lady rapping at me about making healthy food choices. She lives in a refrigerator. This is not okay with me
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
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