but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
She has an emergency bra in her purse. I'm gonna check no on the 'introducing her to my new boyfriend' box.
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
This popcorn tastes like salt and regret. It reminds me of the first blowjob I ever gave.
You've ruined popcorn for me.
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
I just saw a raccoon get launched out of a tree by another raccoon. They have turf wars...
Mass text: You have all failed me. How have the people I loved so much let me go so long in life without ever eating a McRib sandwich?!
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
Randomize
