I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
chimney cleaner pole that expands when button is pushed then pull out. Remember that. We have to patent it.
Who are you high with right now?
He said I was cute and he handed me a stuffed bear from his car. I don't care that he was 80, I named it Hector.
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
im on a boat
How did you get this number?
I am drunk shake weighting right now.
Randomize
