Dude, I couldnt get it up cause she said her parents were home...
ok, come over...I have doritos
what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there really is only one way to give a PowerPoint presentation in your senior capstone class: still drunk.
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
Just stole a goat. Bringing it to your house to cock block. Blame the goat not me.
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
I wanted to make fun of someone saying that to an untrained ear, skrillex is blah blah blah. But it was too soon after they said it. And now I can't find it. These are real problems.
I'm honestly wondering if my vagina did something to offend the universe
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
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