Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
it's a shame restraining orders have to come between me and my relationships
I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
you go from almost hooking up with the hottest guy at the party, to going home with your ex....how is that even mathematically possible
and you wish you could be eating a cookie right now. but all you get to eat is a penis
Just heard the girl at the bar cuss her bf out and order a long island ice tea. Going to give it 5 min then I'm going in. See you on the other side.
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3
Omg sara
I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
I wanted to make fun of someone saying that to an untrained ear, skrillex is blah blah blah. But it was too soon after they said it. And now I can't find it. These are real problems.
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
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