I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
Life lesson: using the oven as a heater= $500 electric bill
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found my keys in the basement freezer. Drunk me is a sneaky little bastard.
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
Dude.. She just busted into my house wearing a ski mask, a poncho, and thigh-high pink hooker boots and yelled, "THE CABS ARE HEEERRREEE!!"
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
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