the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
Nights like last night are what makes cleaning up the vomit in the morning worth it
Well at least he stopped keeping track of money by bottles of McCormick.
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
My mom now keeps ice cubes on hand for my bong water. We may be able to work this relationship out.
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
Major win last night. I traded my roommate two cigs for a six pack and a bag of beef jerky. This has been a Brian weekend update
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
Randomize