Uhh me and Jacque peed on the street outside the bar last night and wiped with flowers. I vaguely remember her repeating the word "fresh" over and over.
a girl just told me i should have been born earlier in the alphabet
I'm about to take my first shit since thursday. I'm scared. pray for me. If I don't make it, tell my family I love them.
Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.
Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
Currently playing charity bingo with coworkers so if u were ever gonna send a dick pic now is the time
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
Kids parked next to me are getting it on. I'm eating chicken nuggets listening to Kanye alone. Happy Valentine's Day.
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
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