you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
Just saw a girl that looks like Michelle Obama and Im strangely aroused by her. Does that make me a democrat?
Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
I woke up with a Nike swoosh shaved into my chest hair. my friend got 3 stitches. my phone had a text that simply read "fuck you". I say it was a good party.
I was so drunk that I didn't realize he was staying at the Waldorf. I walk of shamed the Astoria, do you even know what this means?
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
There is nothing worse than the batteries of your vibrator dying on valentines day
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
He's like a unicorn and I just wanna domesticate him
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
Randomize
