Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
a girl is trying to cook hot pockets in a saute pan on the stove.
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DIDN'T APOLOGIZE? THERE WAS A PEACE OFFERING MADE VIA TACO BELL.
This wedding is gonna be a disaster. I already had to turn down one of the groomsmen who offered me $100 to sleep with him next wknd.
Too low?
Yes.
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
it was just another one of those moments where you unfriendzone a friend you assumed to be gay
Well, I woke up on a roll-away, with a knot in the back of my head and penis confetti stuck to me. Also, I apparently literally gave the shirt off my back right before I passed out, so I was topless. Vegas won this trip.
Floor bacon is actually really good
So apparently I tried texting you last night to tell you I wasn't coming home, but all I had typed were lyrics from Evita
I told him he looked like my uncle.
Why would you say that in a bathtub?
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize
