Erica just called me. She woke up in a storage closet in Mike's building with one shoe and no bag. Can you check your photos from last night to see if she had it at the bar?
I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
make sure you eat your skittles last so when you barf you can barf RAINBOWS.
I'm glad you enjoy my eating disorder so much.
you kept begging me not to tell anyone you had been a bat in another life
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
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