I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
He gave me a card that said "I'm so glad we found each other... In the pants" and a pat on the head... My walk of Shame wasn't so bad.
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
Well get back to your date and give him the ceremonial 1am handy and text me when your done.
He's slurring his text. I didn't think that was possible.
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
so he's a sleeptalker.
yeah??
"Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell" right in my ear. 2 am.
Randomize
