spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
you lied vaginas dont taste like gold fish!
noo i said youre golden if her vagina tastes like fish!
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
im pretty sure you tried to fart so bad you accidently pissed your pants at my party.
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
Should I tell her she gave me head in the kitchen while I was eating a cupcake or would that hurt her dignity too much?
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
I had so much stripper lotion and body glitter on my glasses I had a hard time driving home.
He ripped down his Kate Upton poster while we were having sex last night. Im gonna take that as a good sign.
Last night I made him sit on my bed and finish my burrito bowl as I chanted "brucey" over and over until he was done like they did in Matilda with the chocolate cake
Okay I'm ready to show you that my weiner still works
Too late, I'm convinced it's broken
We're playing drunken roulette. We're taking exlax followed by shots. First person to shit themselves loses!
Randomize
