So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
a woman just threw her tv out the window while screaming "will you fucking work now?". i'm never moving
Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
You called me last night and said you had a vision that a cat made you a sandwich. You were tripping way too hard
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
That's how pantless uber rides happen
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
Oh I had the weirdest dream in which I was an archeologist stealing a golden dildo from a snobby British person
Randomize
