Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
She kept saying my hands are a cupcake factory
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
Things i learned at work today: do not put mayonaise on a tattoo, it will get infected.
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
I'm 2 beers deep on an empty stomach, and I just wanna say, I pride myself on my use of commas
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy
THIS FUCKNUGGET
DOES HE EVEN REALIZE HOW MANY INCREDIBLE INSULTS I'VE WASTED ON HIM
I'VE INSULTED THE EVERLOVING SHIT OUT OF HIM AND HE CAN'T EVEN APPRECIATE IT
THE HO
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
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