You know the guy who poops at a party and then leaves and you go in, do your business, and come out and there are girls outside that think you pooped and no one talks to you? I'm the guy who poops before you go in, because I'm in a relationship and I hate you.
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
Leaving the phone at home last night was the best decision I ever made.... Though I still managed to text her and now I have 2 phones...
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
I'll get him an axe as a present. So he can break out of his closet. That axe being my penis.
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
Oh, cold wet seat on the 48! Are you piss? Are you the sweaty ass leavings of an obese person? Are you the spilled King Cobra from the night before? I do not know! I dare not smell to find out... Pants ruined...
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize
