Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
my brother is so whacked out on percocet from hurting his legs that he started crying because his belly button was so cute
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
Ok roommate is officially weird. Just watched her microwave the same broccoli 3 times in a row and cry b/c she fucked it up. Wtf lol
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
It wasn't so much a one night stand as much as one night she puked on my nightstand.
I told him I was gunna have sex with him in both of our cars at the same time.
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
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